My True Self

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Joined in 2012
July 5, 2012, 15:01

New here. Not to the planet. New to faith and just recently come out. Have the belief that you can't be lesbian and Christian at the same time. Looking forward to getting to know people and gaining support on my journey. Enjoy writing and I work as a not for profit fund raiser.

Having a disability I was under the misconception that if I was in a chair, no one would find me attractive, and so no one taught me the need to find my sexual identity or the need for that part of my life. I spent my life both pretending to like guys and chasing them in order to find what was missing. Like all of us I just wanted someone to love me. I'm finding hard to understand why I'm attracted to women instead of being traditional.

Thank you in advance for your support and understanding.

Joined in 2012
July 5, 2012, 15:58

Hey Mags, and welcome to freedom2b!

I can understand where you're coming from personally as I just came out to my parents yesterday after struggling with my sexuality for 10 years, pretending to be straight but knowing deep down inside I wasn't. I gave my parents an eight page letter with all the thoughts and feelings I had my whole life and that if I didn't tell them I probably wouldn't be here today. I'm glad I didn't top myself because I wouldn't have learnt that it's ok to be yourself, and I believe I've found the meaning to life.

You'll find a TON of support in here, and it's NOT wrong or sinful to be yourself and have those feelings. I prayed many times to God asking why I felt this way and he never answered me when I needed him the most despite him being there for me every single time, but he didn't have to, because with all the support I found on the internet via Youtube with coming out videos, 'it gets better' videos, and amazing places like freedom2b, I found all the answers I needed (especially intertwining my sexuality with my religion), and I am a MUCH happier and stronger person now. I now know that this was Gods plan for me. My calling may be to help others, I don't know, but I do know that I'm happy with being true to myself and I can honestly now answer many of life's difficult questions, and God will always be there to love and support me.

I still haven't come out to my relatives yet, and I'm positive they won't understand what I have gone through, but unfortunately these days we live in a society that is INTOLERANT and IGNORANT towards others, their emotions & feelings, and most importantly, WHO they are as a person. Like Mike Manning says though, there's 6.7 something billion people on this planet. If somebody gives you $#@! for being gay, or bi, or whatever, find someone else that's going to love you for WHO YOU ARE, cause they're out there!

I've got your back, there's organisations out there that have your back, and it does get better.

There's also a guy on here by the name of Wezflash. He has some videos which may help you as they have done for me. There's also his site

Remember, there is no one out there that is youer than you, and don't EVER feel bad for being true to yourself.

God bless,


Mother Hen
Joined in 2011
July 5, 2012, 17:04

Hi Mags,

Welcome to F2B, thanks for sharing a bit about yourself. Take a look around the forum and read some of the amazing stories. Many have struggles with faith and sexuality and many have to come a place of acceptance, peace and hope.

There is an essay my son wrote about his research into the scriptures on what God/biblr actually says about being gay, it really is worth a read. The link can be found on this post.

God Bless

Joined in 2006
July 5, 2012, 18:54

Hi Mags 🙂 Welcome to F2b……great peeps here and so much resource to choose from…..I too use a w/chair and have done fulltime since 2004/5 i was diagnosed with MS in 1998…..I never thought id find a g/friend/partner having wheels but i did and 5yrs on we are still together and its been great 🙂 My own story is on here 🙂 It really is a journey once you come out and you do get highs and lows but its great to have such a neutral space to talk things out which is vital and importantly, know that God DOES love you 🙂 Keep the questions coming, its good to keep us all on our toes 🙂

Ann Maree
Joined in 2008
July 5, 2012, 19:30

Hi Mags

Welcome to f2b! You're in a good place here and we are glad you found us. 🙂

It sounds like you are about to embark on an exciting journey of uncovering important parts of yourself and honouring them. Good for you! Sexuality and spirituality are both beautiful areas and can be integrated. They don't have to be incompatible.

Keep us posted as you go along. There are lots of stories and resources here to access as well. And no doubt these will help support you. Let us know what you think of them and ask whatever questions you like. We're all learning from each other here. 🙂


Ann Maree

Joined in 2010
July 8, 2012, 21:46

Hey Mags

Thank you for being so open and honest and thanks for sharing your story

Warm Hugs


Joined in 2012
July 9, 2012, 09:51

Hi mags

I have recently join freedom2b myself. These are a great bunch of people .

I have been lesbian all my life

struggled all my life with going to church and being lesbain

Thanks to these people and gay christian network (google it)

I reconciled my faith with being lesbian

keep in touch

Anthony Venn-Brown
Joined in 2005
July 10, 2012, 13:12

hi Mags…..glad you found your way here as I sugggested. You will get lots of support and help here with these wonderful people. You can ask any question you want…..and get others perspectives. All have been on a journey……many faced similar issues to you around faith and sexuality.

Joined in 2012
July 17, 2012, 09:37

Hey Mags,

A warm welcome to you. I hope you find all you're looking for here 🙂

Much love,

Joined in 2012
July 24, 2012, 12:17

thanks to all your comments and thoughts

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