Hi, I am new to this site and only recently have come out. There is much I am not sure of and am still trying to find my way reconciling my faith with my sexual orientation, so I thought I'd share a bit of my story.

It has taken me all of my adult life to not only admit to myself that I am attracted to the same gender as I am, but that it is also OK to desire to have a fulfilling relationship. I have been involved in very conservative churches since I was a teen and have always felt different and isolated within these communities. I took it for granted that I would find a man to marry, raise kids and never asked myself if that was applicable to me. yet at the same time I knew I was attracted to women and believed there was something wrong with me. And because of my beliefs at the time I have missed out on many opportunities to be in relationships. It was actually a lesbian friend of mine who got me thinking and examining the reasons why I have always been single.

Accepting my sexuality has been liberating, yet at times I still feel very alone in my experience. At times I feel that I must be the only one who has avoided geting close to someone due to fear of betraying their faith, their family and God.

I cannot imagine being in a heterosexual relationship, yet at times I have questioned whether my having always avoided close encounters makes me less of a lesbian?

Of one thing I am sure of though, God loves me no matter who I am attracted to.

Hi Kreena,

Welcome to F2B, thank you so much for posting some of your story. It takes a great deal of courage to take that first step and post your story. This forum is so encouraging, supporting and accepting. As you read the stories of other people I’m sure they will bring you hope and encouragement. Many have been in similar situations of reconciling their faith and sexual orientation. As I read your story I was thinking how many aspects were similar to Sarab who has already responded. If you have not done so already I encourage you to read her story. She is amazing, has taken huge positive steps forwards and even though she would say she still has some things to work out she has come a long way from when she first joined this forum.

If you get a chance think about going to one of the F2B meetings. They have chapters in Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane and now Perth. They are awesome, lots of fun, friendly, inspiring, motivating and so welcoming and accepting of everyone. 🙂

Look forward to hearing more of your story 🙂

God Bless

Hi Kreena,

Thanks for sharing your story. Welcome to the family – the rainbow family 🙂

I also came out in my mid-30's and I also grew up in a Christian family and was a Pastor's Kid (PK).

It's definitely OK to desire to have a fulfilling relationship. Sometimes I wish I had the courage to come out in my 20's but I also know that I wouldn't have had the emotional maturity then to handle it then.

Tolstoy once said 'the most important time is NOW'. Deep connections are more likely to happen now that you have come out. There is nothing better than feeling free and being able to express who you are to others.

Have the most amazing journey of self-discovery this year.

Hannah