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A Mother's Journey 12 mths on

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Mother Hen
 
Joined in 2011
December 26, 2011, 17:23

It was 12 mths to the day our son "Mr Summit" came out to my husband and myself and told us he was gay. For those who don't know my story you can read it here http://www.freedom2b.org/forums/?vasthtmlaction=viewtopic&t=1544 so I'm not repeating myself. Yes it was a bit of a shock and as parents we had somethingโ€™s to adjust to, issues to sort out etc. However our love, acceptance and support of our son never wavered. Our youngest son (Mr Summit's brother) also had some adjusting, and things to work through as well. I should point out that my husband is just as supportive, loving and accepting of "Mr Summit" as myself he just isn't a forum person. So is our daughter in law, so I guess you could say Mr Summit is pretty fortunate to have the whole family on board.


So how have things changed in our family, well I think things are pretty good at the moment, our son can be open and honest with us and live his life now as an openly gay young man. We have now told all extended family and friends that need to know that our son is Gay, so far so good ๐Ÿ™‚


My husband and I have certainly changed our views and thoughts over the last 12mths. From a scriptural point of view our beliefs changed very quickly and for us has not been an issue. We have been to several F2B meetings and met some interesting and lovely people. We will certainly be going to more down the track. I've joined the F2B forum, It was pointed out a week ago it's only been a little over 7 mths since I joined.


For me personally (after adjusting to the knowledge our son was gay) the biggest impact on me has been the amazing, beautiful, courageous people I have met on this forum. I have been truly touched by your stories. Stories of courage, strength, sadness, pain, joy, love, hope, endurance and faith, stories that have moved and inspired me. I have been deeply saddened by stories of pain, hurt and rejection and celebrated with you in times of joy, growth and personal triumphs. I think I have become a more accepting person and I believe the people on this forum have contributed to that. The love, support and encouragement you all give each other is outstanding. Anthony started a very good thing many years ago that has only grown to be a wonderful supportive, non-judgmental place for all to come too. Everyone who contributes whether on this forum or in other ways to F2B need to take a bow and be proud of the work that has helped F2B to be the awesome place it is today.


My son encouraged me to join the forum he said they didn't have many mums like me. I have found out that some mother's and father's aren't so supportive of their gay children and have even rejected them. As a mother I find this hard to understand and it saddens me greatly. I know we have other wonderful supporting loving parents in the F2B family. Some like Sam's mum Helen have also joined the forum and offer their support and encouragement. It would be awesome to have more parents come onto the forum.


I encourage any parents reading this post who have not yet accepted their child and may have even turned their back on them to open your hearts. From mother to mother, parent to parent, this your child. Unconditional love is not about whether our children do as we ask or behave as we would want. It's not about whether you agree with them or not. Hey all our kids do stuff we are not always happy with but we don't stop loving them. I really believe there is one thing us parents, us mother's should not do and that is withhold our love from our children. Coming from a strong church background I can imagine and even possibly understand the issues and feelings you may be faced with. Friends, churches come and go, but the love we have for our children will remain with us forever.


I read this recently in a book "Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first, the lesson afterward" how true, kind of sucks. We never know what life is going to throw at us; it's in those tough times our true character comes out. I have read stories and posts of some amazing, wonderful, beautiful characters on this forum. We don't always know why we go through tough times but I do know that with the love, support and encouragement of wonderful people and a group like F2B it can help make a positive difference and help lessen the burden. I hope my little bit of input helps in some small way and it's not just the rantingโ€™s of a crazed women ha ha.


May 2012 be a wonderful, happy, safe and healthy year for all. May it bring new and exciting things into your lives.


God bless to you all.



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
December 26, 2011, 17:55

Hi Mother Hen


We are blessed indeed to have you with us.


And no, your post was not the ranting of a crazy woman. Your support means so much, especially because, as you pointed out, there are parents who are either not accepting or who don't know about their child's sexuality.. And it's a scary thing to be LGBTI and not know how your parents will respond. And so your support gives hope and courage to many, knowing that there are some parents (maybe theirs) who will not only be accepting but champion their cause, just as you have with Mr Summit and all of us. ๐Ÿ™‚


Thanks for appealing for more parents to come on board here. That would be a fantastic thing. ๐Ÿ™‚


This is a very timely post too. I'm thinking of Mary, the mother of Christ, giving birth in difficult conditions to a remarkable baby who was different in so many ways. It would not have been an easy path for either of them but she was there as a supportive mother, nurturing and allowing him to grow into the person he was. And so you have done the same for your son and for us at f2b. Thank you so much. ๐Ÿ™‚


Many blessings to you and your family,


Ann Maree



davidt
 
Joined in 2009
December 27, 2011, 22:26

Mother Hen


What an incredible year it has been for you and Mr Summit. It has been a real story of God at work. Thank you for just accepting your son as he is. What a great example that has been for other parents too. Wonderful things can happen when people are Christ like.


Thank you for all the wonderful encouraging posts you have made here. Keep them coming. God is using those – not a doubt.


Fond regards


David



Mother Hen
 
Joined in 2011
December 28, 2011, 12:00

Thank you Ann Maree,

I always appreciate your comments. I enjoy reading your words of wisdom and encouragement that you give to every one on the forum. You are a shining light. You do such wonderful work on the forum we are all truly blessed to have you volunteer your time.


Thankyou David,

It's wonderful kind words like yours and Ann Maree that my little bit of input does indeed help other's that encourages me to keep adding my bit. It would be wonderful if my husband and I are indeed examples for other parents. If our support of our son and my input on this forum helps other parents to be supportive of their child then wow what a wonderful blessing that would be, for us all.


God Bless



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
December 28, 2011, 18:28

Thanks very much, Mother Hen! ๐Ÿ™‚


Blessings,


Ann Maree



grebo5454
 
Joined in 2010
January 3, 2012, 19:30

Hi Mother Hen


My, how quickly the year has gone. I too want to thank you for your wonderful, supportive input to the forum as well. We parents have to band together to love, support, understand, encourage and "just be there" for all our new and old friends on the forum.


I won't be typing on the forum for a few weeks cause I had a bad fall while at Sam's last week and I have a displaced fracture of my left elbow and am off work for 2 weeks to start with. Darn. (It hurts a bit to type). Other than that, we had a fantastic Christmas with Sam and Ben…it was lovely to visit them again.


So on that note, Happy New Year to all my forum friends and keep up the good work Mother Hen.


Love Helen xxx



davidt
 
Joined in 2009
January 3, 2012, 22:07

Hi Helen


I hope your injury heals well. That was unfortunate. Thanks you so much for your support of your son and his partner. I am certain that means a tremendous amount to them. What a great role model you are for other parents of gays.


In Him


David



Mother Hen
 
Joined in 2011
January 4, 2012, 11:30

Thankyou Helen for your kind words. Totally agree we have to band together to support and love all our new friends on the forum. I think we can and are making a difference when we all stand together, this year could be an interesting year.


Ouchhhhhhhhhhhhhhh on the elbow. You take it easy, it's a pain in more ways that one but all you can do is rest in these situations. As you said gives you a chance to catch up on the forum, we have some wonderful new people joined us lately.


Of course I hope you are taking the opportunity to be fully pampered and looked after. As a mother and wife you have done plenty of that for other's now it's your turn to let other's look after you.


Take care.



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
January 4, 2012, 20:41

Hi Helen


Sending some healing energy your way now. You're another great mother who we're lucky to have in this community. Get well soon. ๐Ÿ™‚


Blessings,


Ann Maree



grebo5454
 
Joined in 2010
January 5, 2012, 14:14

Thanks Anne Maree and Mother Hen


Bored already lol. It's hard to type with one hand when you are used to 2. Am enjoying reading all the new posts on the forum and its so good that there are soooo many new people joining us.


Love Helen xxx


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