well my life experience says this – yes some fears are crippling and others are very healthy
you have to work out the difference and mostly through experience and listening to your spirit/soul/instinct (whatever you refer it as)
as far as coming out – we have to weight everything up
and everyone’s situation is unique to them,
i found in part that i feared very bad reactions from my kids and family but they were great (fear was unfounded)
while when i came out to people from my church days as they came across me (cos i left church for non sexuality reasons) – well they were most typical and ugly for the most part – some of them 6 years later still sneer at me and abuse me verbally when they see me in the shopping centers/beach etc
i think the fear of the unknown and our imagination is our worst enemy
but for me – coming out was the most liberating experience i have ever encountered in my life
and i had a fairly wild (as in good) conversion to Christ believing
But i was not in church when i came out
I think that would be a major factor in deciding to come out or not, depending on your church, the leadership etc
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