Guy, Married With Children, Questioning

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Joined in 2010
July 3, 2010, 13:48



Ann Maree
Joined in 2008
July 3, 2010, 17:53

Hi steveo

Welcome to f2b!

There are many, many others who have been where you are and some encouraging stories to read in the Telling our stories section of this site. If you haven’t already, check some of them out.

Being lost and dealing with inner conflict is very difficult but you won’t always be in that space. And no, life is not about living in torment. It really doesn’t have to be like that. And yes, there is a way forward.

I believe God hasn’t healed you because there’s nothing to heal. You are more than OK the way you are.

Have you got someone open minded and trustworthy you can talk with in confidence? I would strongly advise that you seek this as a first step for dealing with your turmoil and for sharing the burden. It’s important to build supports around you so you can make rational decisions and stay safe.

We are here for you as well in whatever way we can be of support. So keep sharing with us.

It would also be great if you can post this in the Telling our Stories section so more people see it and have a chance to respond. You are definitely not alone.


Ann Maree

Joined in 2009
July 3, 2010, 23:04


Thanks so much for posting!!! You will find ways of working through your struggles here- and you won’t have to be doing your head in any longer.

As Annmaree said, there are many stories and discussions in ‘telling our stories’ that might give you some clarity. There are a number of recent posts- near the top of the list- that are from guys in similar positions to yours. I was married with children, sincere in getting married- but for the wrong reasons, I only now realise. While there was pain (and still is) my life is much happier now than it was (see

We understand the anguish- and we want to help you work through it. please keep talking with us! There are many views on this site- but more than anything, you will find that people care and are non-judgemental.

P E A C E to you


Anthony Venn-Brown
Joined in 2005
July 4, 2010, 13:58

Hey Steveo……I have moved your post into the telling our stories section as that is often where people go to find stories they relate to.

I know there are many of us who relate totally to your story. there comes a time in our lives when the fragmenting of self we have done to conform to church family and society becomes way too much. Its called cognitive dissonance.

Instead of writing lots there are some things I’ve prepared on the net that will be of some help

this has an intro that I’m sure you will relate to

and here is a recent article I wrote about our situation.

I hope this helps

Anthony Venn-Brown
Joined in 2005
July 4, 2010, 14:04

just thought this recent entry on my blog would also be useful…….it mentions the generational impact

Joined in 2008
July 4, 2010, 16:22

Hi steveo,

Welcome to freedom2b[e]. I’ve changed the title of your post so other members can identify with your story. Hope you don’t mind. Let me or one of the other Moderators know if there are any concerns.

We are here to help and support you in your journey!

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