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Holiday Blues

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Jayindieburg
 
Joined in 2008
November 26, 2013, 10:40

Hi Freedom 2 B ers, Jayindieburg here. Its been a long time since i've been by the forum. I apologize but will try to come by more often. I've had a few major events happen in my life since last here. The most major, is the death of my father 2 years ago this coming January. The last time I saw him was in November, Thanksgiving 2 years ago. Now that the holidays are here I'm reminded of this and its really hard. Life since then has not been the same and I'm sure it won't. I'm a fairly positive person and always believes that change is the only constant in life but it is no less easier when you have the loss of a parent on or around the holidays. Don't mean to bring anyone down but hoping to get some helpful words from others who may have experienced the same. Thanks for being here and it looks like you guys are growing and touching so many lives over the years may the God of your understanding continue to bless and guide you. Happy Holidays…..Jay aka Jayindieburg

Mother Hen
 
Joined in 2011
November 26, 2013, 13:14

Hi Jayindieburg,


This time of year is not always a positive time for people. It's touted in the media as a happy, jolly family time when in reality many people are hurting around this time due to the loss of a loved one who can no longer be present to share in the festive spirit. Break up in relationships, family splits, tensions etc. For you it's particularly difficult as it's around the anniversary of the loss of your father. I think one thing you have to give yourself permission to do is grieve. I'm sure all your friends and family will be understanding of you feeling grief and sadness at this time, I would encourage you to let people around you know that you are feeling a bit down at the moment and why. Maybe you could think of the wonderful happy times you have had with your father. He maybe gone but those memories are with your forever and something to cherish. 🙂

Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
November 26, 2013, 18:45

Hi Jayindieberg

Nice to hear from you again, albeit at a sad time for you.

I agree with Mother Hen's wise words. This time is often not a happy time for many. It can really heighten grief and loss when happy families are promoted so much. I believe the media plays a part in raising peoples' hopes and expectations beyond what can be achieved in reality and this can be heart breaking when reality doesn't measure up with the dream. In your case, your loss is doubly sad. It's the anniversary of when you last saw your father and also a time when many families and friends come together, again emphasising his absence. 2 years is really not a long time after a major loss so it sounds like you are going through a process of normal grieving.

Be kind to yourself and spend time with gentle people.

Blessings,

Ann Maree

Jayindieburg
 
Joined in 2008
November 27, 2013, 00:47

Thank you Mother Hen, I appreciate your encouragement. I have my better moments and I will allow my sadness and grief be known to others. I guess really I already have here on the forum. I will let others closer to me know my feelings as well. Still would like to hear from others who are grieving and how they cope. Blessings to you and yours this holiday season. Jay

Jayindieburg
 
Joined in 2008
November 27, 2013, 00:52

Thanks Ann Marie your words mean a lot. I plan on it. I've never thought how media plays a part in all this. You don't see it till your on this side of the fence so to speak. Again thanks. Blessings to you and yours during the Holidays…Jay
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