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Let's talk about sex, baby...

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Thingymabobie
 
Joined in 2011
September 10, 2011, 12:42

Hey errr-body!


I have a question for ya’ll! So, 99% of people on this forum would say Jesus is “okay with gay”. I know that he loves us as we are and accepts us as is. I don’t believe that ex-gay programs work, but believe some people can obtain a level of function hetrosexuality…anyway, I digress.


For those of you who are walking with Jesus and are gay- Where do you stand on the issue of sex? Ultimately, most christian would believe that only expression of sex should be in marriage… the GLBTI are yet to get marriage rights… How does sex work in your relationships? Sorry if I’m not making sense… just trying to get my head around it.


Whilst I don’t think I’d mind being emotionally connected to another guy, I wonder if I’d still feel guilty or convicted of sin if I were to actually have sex, even in a commited relationship?



davidt
 
Joined in 2009
September 10, 2011, 21:12

In a heterosexual marriage, a minister or celebrant doesn’t marry a couple. They marry each other the first time they are intimate. The marriage ceremony is mainly held to meet a legal requirement, but has obvious implications for Christians as they make their vows before God.


My view is the same for gay couples. Sex should be confined to within gay marriage. It should wait until they have fallen in love and committed to spend the rest of their lives together in a monogamous relationship. I fully support gay marriage on this basis.



Thingymabobie
 
Joined in 2011
September 10, 2011, 21:16

Thanks David!!



Mr Summit
Chapter Leader
Joined in 2010
September 11, 2011, 13:54

Hi Thingymabobie,


You’ll find a range of different opinions on this issue, just as you’ll find people at a range of different places on their spiritual journeys. It’s can be an interesting discussion to say the least.


Some good resources to get you thinking.

One is by AVB, and can be found by emailing him in accordance with this thread here: http://www.freedom2b.org/topic/277

The other is by Crave MCC: http://www.cravemcc.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=11&Itemid=32


Neither will tell you what to believe, but they should get the juices flowing.



Mr Summit
Chapter Leader
Joined in 2010
September 11, 2011, 14:10

Also, for your interest SIECUS (Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States) publishes the following list of behaviors of a sexually healthy adult:


* appreciate ones own body

* interact with both genders in respectful and appropriate ways

* affirm one’s own sexual orientation and respect the sexual orientation of others

* express love and intimacy in appropriate ways

* avoid exploitative or manipulative relationships

* exhibit skills that enhance personal relationships

* identify and live according to one’s values

* communicate effectively with family, peers, and partners

* enjoy and express one’s sexuality throughout life

* express one’s sexuality in ways congruent with one’s values

* engage in sexual relationships that are characterized by honesty, equity, and responsibility

* prevent sexual abuse

* avoid contracting or transmitting a sexually transmitted disease

* demonstrate tolerance for people with different sexual values

* avoid behaviors that exhibit prejudice and bigotry

* educate others about sexuality


This definitely forces us to think of sexual ethics in a much broader way than we are probably used to.



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
September 11, 2011, 15:05

Hi Mr Summit


I like this list from SIECUS. Thanks for posting it. 🙂


Blessings,


Ann Maree



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
September 11, 2011, 15:59

Hi Thingymabobie


Firstly I’ve never believed sex should be restricted only to marriage. I don’t agree with Christians who preach that. When I used to attend church, I noticed that many Christians were having quick engagements, some even getting married just so they could have sex! In my opinion that makes a mockery of marriage and isn’t a good enough reason to enter into such a commitment. I think if the church took a more realistic view, people might make more sensible decisions and not feel pressured to rush into something before they’re ready. Apart from that, many Christians engage in all kinds of sexual activities before marriage and this so-called ‘sin’ isn’t treated with the same disdain as homosexual sex. Even for those who believe homosexuality is wrong, it’s no more wrong than the so-called promiscuity of premarital heterosexual sex (again, I don’t believe either are wrong). So no matter what one’s beliefs are around homosexuality, there’s a double standard and hypocrisy here that stinks.


My personal belief is that sex is more meaningful and rich when it occurs in a loving and committed relationship. And just because casual sex is not for me doesn’t mean this will automatically be the same for others. I don’t think it’s my job or the church’s to prescribe a set of sexual behaviours for others.


As you say, same sex couples cannot legally marry in Australia. Does that mean they should remain celibate until allowed to legally marry? No, definitely not unless they feel particularly called to that way of life. I believe that celibacy is a unique gift/calling bestowed on a select few only. To take that on when not called to it would be a huge burden and wrong in itself. We were called to live abundantly not be adding unnecessary suffering to our lives. For many adults, expressing sexuality is part of living to one’s fullest potential and making the most of what we were given. Each person needs to look within and examine their own heart in this regard and do what they feel led toward. Whatever one’s choice, whether celibate or sexually active, I believe the outcome needs to be one that enhances both life and love.


I think it’s also worth thinking about what marriage actually means and if a committed relationship or civil union are equal in terms of comparing quality of commitment. I personally think it’s down to the individual couples. I know many committed or defacto relationships (both straight and gay) that are more loving than some marriages. So you could argue that sex is more fitting for the defacto relationships in this case than the marriages!


Blessings,


Ann Maree



Thingymabobie
 
Joined in 2011
September 11, 2011, 17:48

Thanks for the responses guys…


Does AVB still use that email?



Mr Summit
Chapter Leader
Joined in 2010
September 11, 2011, 18:30

I am unsure, but you can probably private message him with details of an email address he could send it to.



davidt
 
Joined in 2009
September 19, 2011, 15:43

I am a strong supporter of gay marriage and there has been a lot said about it lately.


But I like Hebrews 11:1 “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for…”


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