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Time to tell my Christian Parents

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Mr Summit
Chapter Leader
Joined in 2010
October 5, 2010, 23:28

I’m really eager to hear how this turns out.



Anthony Venn-Brown
 
Joined in 2005
October 6, 2010, 14:21

yep…..we are all waiting to hear how things went……amazing community of caring people we have here



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
October 8, 2010, 20:50

How did things go muffins?



muffins
 
Joined in 2010
October 15, 2010, 02:30

G’day everyone. Thanks for your messages and offers of prayer. It’s a nice feeling to know that at least there are some God-fearing people out there who care!


So, parents got the letter just before I went away. When I got home, they were super friendly and greeted me at the door with hugs which was nice.


Mum and I have chatted about it. She was shocked but ok about it – way better than I thought actually. I feel like she wants to chat more about it, but I’ve been slack in following it up.


Dad hasn’t mentioned it once. Mum said that he blames himself and just worries that I’ll change when/if I start telling everyone.


Truthfully, in hindsight, I don’t know whether it was really worth it or not. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. I really don’t think i’ll ever experience a relationship with a guy, so what was the reason for even bothering to come out? Did I even need to?


Also still thinking hard about ministry opportunities from this too. I’ve spent the last 4 or 5 years basically hating myself for being gay. Contemplated suicide etc many times and come kinda close, done some minor self-harm and risky behaviour, all because of this one thing. It just seems so pointless – this has basically controlled my life for the past few years, and now you put it all in perspective and it seems so stupid. If it were not for the teaching of the church, and the constant reinforcement that being homo is this “conscious decision to live a life of sin” (which I have not necessarily had taught, but definitely implied), I probably would not have suffered with this burden as I have! But then there must be so many more like me out there, hidden in our churches, feeling completely trapped and isolated by their own sexuality that they are powerless to change – and with no one the turn to for help or advice!! It’s hardly ideal, and we know that it’s certainly not the way God would want it!!! Grrrr, I think i’m getting passionate about this, haha!


Anyway, just a few thoughts. Thanks again.



muffins
 
Joined in 2010
October 15, 2010, 02:34

And just one more thing on that – good on you Anthony and especially Ben (but everyone on here really) for your courage and passion to want to see young people hearing that God loves them whatever their sexuality! I reckon there are so many that just need to hear that (and for that matter generally, not just regarding issues of sexuality) but how do you get the message out? So many people but so little time!!!



Ann Maree
 
Joined in 2008
October 15, 2010, 07:34

Hi muffins


Good to hear from you. 🙂


Well that sounds like a positive outcome with your parents. Well done! 🙂


You however sound like you’re going through a period of self doubt. This is common after a major disclosure: feeling exposed and wondering if you’ve made things worse for yourself. This is just a phase and one you will move through.


I think spreading a message of love happens most effectively when we have learnt to accept and love ourselves. People in our company then feel good about themselves, almost like they’re unconsciously given a seed that permits self love to grow. I believe that we can’t love others properly until we truly love ourselves. And I agree with you that there are many people who need to know love, both from within and with others.


Blessings,


Ann Maree



Anthony Venn-Brown
 
Joined in 2005
October 17, 2010, 01:54

But then there must be so many more like me out there, hidden in our churches, feeling completely trapped and isolated by their own sexuality that they are powerless to change – and with no one the turn to for help or advice!! It’s hardly ideal, and we know that it’s certainly not the way God would want it!!! Grrrr, I think i’m getting passionate about this, haha!

Anyway, just a few thoughts. Thanks again.


…..and there lies our challenge Muffins…….. how do we reach group 2



muffins
 
Joined in 2010
October 25, 2010, 21:10

Letter:


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