It’s a good question about when the best time is to come out…. I agree with cheeky that feeling as safe as possible is necessary. For me this involved having as many supports in place in case the outcome was not favourable. It also involved guaging others’ responses beforehand and not coming out if I had solid evidence that they would be unsupportive. Internal resolution was part of that process, in that I’d done a lot of positive self talk and soul searching…. It helped me to be certain about where I was at and able to feel positively about myself regardless of their responses. This preparation also better equipped me in being able to explain my position to others.

Hi Timothy

Thanks for your comments, it always surprises me when people are moved by something I write. I agree with you in that more and more people are accepting, even my dad made that comment, about a more tolerant society when i came out to him which really shocked me as a decade ago he would have been one of the least tolerant….I know I built the possible negative responses up in my mind for many years, especially those in the church which is what kept me in fear, but I have been surprised so far….

Living unafraid…now there’s something i never thought i could do until avb encouraged me to unpack my fears…I have a bit of a journey ahead as I’ve only just come out to those friends and family closest to me and to be honest it feels like I’m still a wee bit ‘in’ as not everyone knows 🙂

Sometimes a sense of regret creeps in (wasted years) and I too wonder how my life would’ve turned out if only…..can’t live like that though or I’d never get out of bed in the morning lol…

I checked out the BeLonG To videos (thanks for the link) – I think it’s great that young people have organisations actively working to support them with their sexuality, it is so important to ‘belong’ – something the church could take a few lessons about before starting to speak about ‘believing’ then ‘behaving’…

Thanks for the words of encouragement….it makes a difference 🙂

Cheeky

…absolutely avb, only when you resolve the internal conflict can you find the strength to even think about telling others,,,the telling of my story sent those close to me on their journey of acceptance and inner struggle to understand what they believe and why the believe it…

I guess we just keep passing it on….playing it forward.

I think for some of us this can be an even greater motivation than just wanting to live openly and honestly…….helping others and making difference is high on my priority list. Its often been above my own needs…..not always a good thing….but better than living selfishly.