I'm 38 yr old woman & decided to come out

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Joined in 2011
November 5, 2014, 22:21

Hi Miss Muppet – well – it's been a long while since I have visited f2b – and it's so great to read what's been happening for you.

You said that you feel lonely like "damaged goods" and wondered how you might go about meeting someone…

Boy – I can really relate to all of that!!!

As you may recall – It took me years and years to move out of the life of being alone. I felt quite stuck – fearful – awkward – and idiotic – i couldn't conceive of how i might move out of the stuckness into something that might lead me to a relationship – a different way of being…

So – what did I do? I took some careful "risks" I signed up for internet dating on a lesbian site. I went to meet up groups with lesbian women. I went to lesbian "open house" – a discussion and meeting group.Damaged goods? Yep – having never partnered, having a number of health problems – yes I felt like damaged goods at times…. and yet – I was lucky enough to meet my now partner of 13 months – amazing!!!

My lovely girlfriend has now moved in with me – and we continue to love being with each other.

The world awaits you Miss Muppet!! Stick with it – all the best

Sarab xxx

Joined in 2011
November 6, 2014, 11:11

Naww thanks so much Sarab! You have encouraged me greatly. I think I'm starting to grow up & not be so hard on myself. Life happens & it's often difficult but I can take what's positive & run with it! And be glad at what is right now. Thanks so much. You're sweet. Glad things are working out so great for you!

Joined in 2011
November 6, 2014, 11:17

Just wanted to add that I have tried online dating. Some things went a bit bad but I think it's because I'm learning still. I never dated at school or ever before actually! I'm shy & only now have I started to accept myself. Need to keep reaching out to others but I'm like a turtle & like my shell. Don't like being hurt but in the process you miss out on the good bits too. Surely there are good bits waiting for me.

Joined in 2014
November 19, 2014, 13:46

woooooo! You go girl! You've got great things in store for you. xx

Joined in 2011
December 1, 2014, 12:37

Hello. I'm.thankful that the difficult times with my neighbor was finished with a few weeks ago. I wanted to part in peace but seems like I caused such offence that it ended badly. Never been through such horrible stuff. I'm still too scared to be outside but at least since blocking them on my phone leaves me in peace. I'll move out at some point. Just want my own space.

I've been in hospital with pneumonia but improving each day. Think the stress didn't help. I'm feeling myself pulling back from people again. Finding it hard to trust. I'm too sensitive & I can't relax. I only feel safe in my own company at the moment. I'm seeing my psychologist this arvo. I just still don't understand how I upset my neighbor. She called my a religious freak & a user. And I've been getting unkind sms from her for months. When I've been nothing but passive back. Just finding it hard to fight the negative feelings. I know I'm unique. I really don't want this to happen again.

Joined in 2011
December 1, 2014, 12:42

Ok just wanted to add that because i've gotten to know a girl who wasn't a Christian last year, I've been accused of using her, as if I had no intention of taking things further. But it's not my fault she didn't stick around long enough to wait until I was ready to become more affectionate.

So right now, I know I believe in Jesus, my sexuality once again makes me feel sick. I'm lost in between these 2 worlds! Every part of me just wants to be left alone & stay single. I feel flawed & very hurt.

Joined in 2011
December 4, 2014, 12:47

Think I'm finally getting it. I rely too much on others. I saw my psych today & I take on other people's stuff. I go to my appt & talk about how others impact on me, I'm far too sensitive. But apart from that, I just don't like myself. So affirmation from others helps me. But that's no good.

I need to be happy with myself apart from anyone else. As selfish as it sounds to a very religious me, I need to work on myself. I have a choice. Give up right now or focus on what makes me happy.

I'm.not sure what makes me happy. Think I should be doing a personal journal instead of writing here.

Mother Hen
Joined in 2011
December 19, 2014, 17:33

Hi MIss Muppet,

Hope you are doing well. Haven't been on for a while, life got very busy.

Hope you have an awesome Christmas and 2015 is an amazing year for you. 🙂

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