Anthony, on Saturday you were talking to me about how ‘gay pride’ is made powerful through ‘gay shame’. Before any of this coming out business, whilst I was accepted by these people… I was being rejected by myself. The shame that I felt is so so much harder to deal with than this petty bullying- and the power of that shame is broken increasingly through the people I meet, f2b meetings, and everything else I’m getting involved with… whilst I may not be there yet, the journey is definitely underway.
that is a great insight Scotty…..never thought of it that way before.
Here is the section in my notes that relates to what we were speaking about on Saturday night.
All over the world LGBT people celebrate Gay Pride with festivals, events and parades. It’s a time when we celebrate our diversity and uniqueness. People often criticise these events wondering why we feel it is necessary to have a parade or month of activities. ‘Why do you have to flaunt it, we don’t have a heterosexual pride day’, they say. Straight people rarely understand gay pride because they have never experienced gay shame. And because they are heterosexual don’t realise that every day is heterosexual day.
As LGBT people we bring something unique to the world. This is reflected in some industries that have a high proportion of gay and lesbian people. Hospitality, call centres, nursing are just some examples. There is something about us that makes us good with people and serving others.
And of course where would all the wonderful art, music, theatre, fashion, design etc be if it wasn’t for the gays. We certainly are creative and add colour. Our tribe and events are unique. Whilst we know that not every gay man or lesbian fits stereotypes it can be said that there are, generally speaking, things that are different to the average heterosexual person. We make an enormous contribution to this world. Although others might try and tell us something different, those who have truly found their place in the LGBT community know it’s not all about sex. Not by a long shot. We have a culture, history and energy. We need to move beyond just acceptance of our gay selves to a place of pride and celebration.