Resolving the perceived conflict of faith and sexuality is a difficult path for most people from a traditional/conservative Christian culture. GLBTIQ people from Pentecostal or Charismatic backgrounds have specific needs to be addressed in order to resolve that internal conflict.
GLBTIQ people from Pentecostal or Charismatic churches have been involved in a form of Christianity that is extremely experiential. We have probably sensed the presence of God, seen miracles and healings, enjoyed vibrant worship, spoken in tongues, believed that the Bible is the inspired inerrant Word of God, had prayers answered and been totally committed to Jesus Christ and the church. It has been the foundation not only to our lives but also to our social network. Our identity above everything else has been that we are a Christian.
At some stage, we have believed that homosexuality is against God’s order and we must change in order to fulfill God’s purpose in our lives.
In other words, there are only two options.
1. Be heterosexual and a Christian or
2. Be gay or lesbian and go to hell.
We have prayed and cried out to God to set us free but nothing changed. This creates a psychological dissonance between our faith and our sexuality.
Questions begin to arise in our minds and beliefs take hold such as.
• Why can’t I change my attraction to the same sex?
• Maybe I am just too weak or I don’t have enough faith?
• Why is God ignoring me?
• I am a really bad person.
• Forgiveness is only for those who repent and forsake their sin.
• Something is wrong with me
We may have left the church, been asked to leave or are living a closeted life, struggling, even tormented with the conflict our sexuality has created with our Christian experience.
On the other hand, some of us may have left our Pentecostal or Charismatic lifestyles before coming out, or have not experienced a problem in reconciling our faith and our gender and/or sexuality. Nevertheless, our church background may still be having an impact on us, which is not well understood by those who have not had similar experiences.
We may also be experiencing a degree of alienation in our attempts to integrate with GLBTIQ communities. We may be encountering a degree of hostility or misunderstanding in these communities with regard to Christian faith. Some of us may also experience a degree of discomfort with what we may perceive as the prevailing sexual ethos in GLBTIQ communities, and may think that there is no place for us in such communities.
There are several groups of people from Pentecostal and Charismatic churches that Freedom 2 b(e) can assist. Numbers do not reflect priority as each group is equally important.
Group 1. GLBTIQ people who have left Pentecostal and Charismatic Churches
Freedom 2 b[e] recognises the specific needs of this group who can be particularly vulnerable. Many have lost their social network, having experienced rejection by friends and family. Some who have been employed in Christian organisations may have lost their livelihoods and experienced hostility from employers and/or colleagues. They have a sense of failure and shame as they perceive that they have ‘given in’ to their homosexuality. They have either been exposed and thrown out of the church or have quietly left knowing it is impossible to change and they will never be accepted as they are. Even though they have accepted their homosexuality they may still live with the subconscious belief that they will go to hell.
The results of the internal dissonance affect people in different ways. For gay men that might include self-destructive behaviours such as unsafe sex and substance abuse. Some have been living with a sexual addiction. Gay men and lesbians can have mental health issues such as depression, and be grieving the loss of a sense of ‘family’ or strong community they once found in church. Some may also be dealing with bitterness and resentment towards individuals, the church and God. Many of these people have also been traumatized by the experience of leaving the church and supposedly turning their back on God.
After leaving the church there may be difficulties integrating with GLBTIQ communities, Sometimes resulting in feelings of alienation, isolation and disillusionment. Constructing and coming to terms with a new gender and/or sexual identity and new personal relationships can also be fraught, and may bring some to the point of self-harming behaviours.
The needs:
a) A non-judgemental safe space where they don’t feel there is any agenda except to support them on their journey. All we need to do is listen, not advise or tell them what they should do. If they ask questions then it’s appropriate to respond with information that can help them which may include our personal stories.
b) Connection with other GLBTIQ from the same background that reduces the sense of isolation and that they are the only ones that have had this experience.
c) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups.
Group 2. GLBTIQ people in Pentecostal and Charismatic Churches who are not out
The majority at this time are closeted or live in a ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ culture and therefore have specific needs. The dissonance for most of these people is the most intense as they are still living in the world that creates the dissonance. This also makes this group particularly vulnerable. We know that in just one Pentecostal church in Melbourne, over a two-year period, three young men killed themselves. The issue – their homosexuality.
The needs:
a) A non-judgemental safe space
b) Confidentiality
c) Theological resources
d) Advocacy
e) Connection with other GLBTIQ believers
f) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups.
Group 3. GLBTIQ people in Pentecostal and Charismatic Churches who are out
This group needs lots of encouragement and support, as they are the trailblazers who will make a difference for future generations.
The needs:
a) A non-judgemental safe space
b) Support
c) Theological resources
d) Connection with other GLBTIQ believers
e) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups.
Group 4. GLBTIQ people from other Christian denominations
Everyone is welcome at Freedom 2 b(e). Some from other church backgrounds might enjoy the sense of community that we are creating and want to connect with like-minded people.
The needs:
a) A non-judgemental safe space
b) Support
c) Theological resources
d) Connection with other GLBTIQ believers
e) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups.
Group 5. GLBTIQ people from Pentecostal/Charismatic backgrounds who are exploring alternative spiritual paths or have integrated parts of their previous belief system with their new spirituality.
The needs:
a) A non-judgemental safe space
b) Support
c) Connection with other GLBTIQ people
d) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups.
Group 6. Heterosexual Friends, Family and Supporters
As GLBTIQ people, we are a minority group. GLBTIQ people from Pentecostal and Charismatic backgrounds are a very small subset. We welcome all heterosexuals from the same background who are genuinely seeking to understand or through the relationships with people they love or their own research, have come to see that the churches traditional beliefs on homosexuality and gender issues are unfounded, unjust and not in harmony with the concept of a loving Creator. Freedom 2 b[e] welcomes their contribution and support at events, forums and assisting with advocacy.
The needs:
a) Support
b) Theological resources, books and research information
c) Our stories
d) Other resources/information/referrals such as common interest, crisis and support groups
e) Confidence in the integrity of Freedom 2 b[e]
Your comments are welcome
thanks
Anthony, Sue, Phill, Terese and Paul
Freedom 2 b[e] Board
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