I decided to act some more

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Joined in 2012
September 3, 2012, 08:58

Hey guys and thanks <3 I guess I will never know what seed it has planted, though there wasn't any harm trying. I guess I'm just disappointed to have had no replies at all from any of the major churches. I finally got a reply back from that Nick guy by the way:

Hey Jordan

I appreciate your willingness to listen. I will put something together this week outlining the biblical view, I do hope you find it helpful.

Chat soon

In Him


I will send a reply back noting that, by the wording of his email, he wants to 'change' me as he wants me to find it 'helpful'. I think I will politely mention that nothing will change my sexual orientation and that there is no point trying to do so, but I am willing to listen to his views on the biblical evidence he has on homosexuality. I don't think he actually read my full email, so I will make note of that also.

Thanks again for all the support

Edit: I sent this back in reply to Nick:

Hey, thanks for the reply Nick

I am definitely willing to listen, however I do not know if it is just me or whether I am looking into things too much? (So please correct me if I am wrong here) But by the way you worded your email in hoping I find your views helpful, it just sounds to me like you want to change my sexual orientation. I just want to make note and mention the fact that nothing has or ever will change my sexual orientation (as mentioned in my first email), but yes I am definitely willing to listen to your views on homosexuality from a biblical view, and I will do my best to answer them. I just wanted to let you know that I have tried changing my sexual orientation and that nothing has or ever will change this part of me, God factor included.

Hope to hear from you soon!

Peace and Grace,


Ann Maree
Joined in 2008
September 3, 2012, 18:48

Hi Jordan

If Nick is tying to change you, as you suspect, he is confusing sexual orientation with same sex behaviours. Orientation is much more than a set of behaviours. Orientation, unlike behaviours, is not something we can change. I guess it's hard for some heterosexual Christians who are anti gay (assuming this man is anti gay) to know what it's like to be gay. I mean he can provide the 'biblical view' as he sees it. But what difference does it make if you can't change your sexual orientation? How does the bible help in that case? The sections of the bible in Deuteronomy that refer to not wearing certain fabrics together, not eating shell fish and separating menstruating women from the rest of the group are not things useful for us to apply anymore in this part of the world. And there are other parts of the bible also not 'helpful' to us in this time and society. Application of the bible has to be grounded in this day and age. It's meant to be dynamic and fluid, not staid and stuck. Mercy always needs to win out over law, as it did in Old Testament times with widows and orphans who weren't being cared for properly. So they changed the law in order to better care for their most vulnerable and marginalised rather than using it to inflict further suffering. Christians and others in today's world would do well to remember that.


Ann Maree

Joined in 2012
September 10, 2012, 21:51

Hey all, just a final (I think? It's been a while since I sent the emails so I guess it's all over now) update 😛

Of the 50 churches I sent the email / testimony to (and don't worry I am not sending any more emails to NZ churches due to my own state of mind and keeping myself safe from hurtful messages) only three responded. Two were nasty and very negative, but that was to be expected.

But one had helped a lady who just came out as lesbian, and just today I checked up on a pastor's sermon at a church I once went to, where I sent my testimony a few days before Father's day, and he touched on the gay agenda for a couple minutes. It may have only been a few minutes to him, but it meant the world to me.

You can check out what he said at 20 minutes 40 seconds here:

Maybe there is hope after all? Heck, I helped one lady and spread a little hope in another church. I couldn't have asked for anything more! And all it took was a little time, effort, and sending my testimony via email to 50 churches.

Chapter Leader
Joined in 2008
September 16, 2012, 21:35

Jordon – G'day!

You are contributing to change in your own way. Some people will never change their views. But others gradually soften and become open to change. Still others gradually start to change. The operative word for me is 'gradually'. Some people are called to the 'big stick' approach. That is being combative. loud, very public. Some are called to guerilla tactics.

Must most of us just need to hang in there and 'preach' via our lives (i.e., show that we are normal, caring, happy, God-believing, people) and use the little opportunities we are given to speak into situtations with words which help break down the ignorance.

Keep up the good work of creating both a climate for change, as well as actual -abeit, gradual and incremental – change.

Bless ya! ~ david

Ann Maree
Joined in 2008
September 17, 2012, 07:49

Hi Jordan

..But one had helped a lady who just came out as lesbian, and just today I checked up on a pastor's sermon at a church I once went to, where I sent my testimony a few days before Father's day, and he touched on the gay agenda for a couple minutes. It may have only been a few minutes to him, but it meant the world to me.

That's so fantastic, Jordan. 🙂 He didn't have to do this but he did and I think that's significant and something you helped influence. 🙂

I agree with what forestgrey has said that there are all kinds of way to bring about positive change and it doesn't have to be in a loud, obvious way. Sure there are those who are called to be activists and advocates in a very public way, and hopefully not aggressively. And there are others who simply live their lives with joy and acceptance and this speaks volumes, albeit in a quieter way.


Ann Maree

Joined in 2012
September 17, 2012, 07:52

Thanks David! I think I'll take that approach from now on.

It's like what Ellen Degeneres has done – she is showing everyone around the world that she isn't 'out to get people' as some heterosexual people seem to think gay and lesbian people are doing, and she is changing so many minds but she isn't forcing people to do so, rather, making people aware of the injustice, ignorance and intolerance which can (and has) led to gay bashing and gay suicides.

She's amazing. In fact just the other week Ellen got her star on the Hollywood walk of fame (about time I say).

Now this was a while back, but I'm surprised Ellen accepted JC Penny's offer of being in their advertisements, because they dumped her when she came out of the closet in real life – just goes to show how dignified and respectful Ellen is. I think it is fair to say most people would tell them to go 'eat fish' after being kicked out of something simply for being who you are.

Edit: Thanks Ann! Just noticed your post after I posted this!

Ann Maree
Joined in 2008
September 17, 2012, 17:35

Hi Jordan

Re Ellen DeGeneres, from what I can see it was groups like One Million Moms (affiliated with American Family Association) that wanted Ellen to lose her gig with JC Penney. However, to their credit, JC Penney remained committed to their contract with Ellen.


Ann Maree

Joined in 2012
September 17, 2012, 18:40

Oh, thanks for clearing that up Ann 😛 I heard a story about JC Penney dropping Ellen a while ago but I must have missed the whole story. That link clarified it all 🙂 Here I was all this time thinking it was JC Penney who dropped her! Eek.

Thanks again,


Joined in 2012
September 19, 2012, 10:09

Hey Jordan,

Did you ever get your Concept 2 rower? How's it working out for you?

Joined in 2012
September 19, 2012, 19:30

Hey RQC 😛 Yes my dad found a concept 2 rower for sale and I'm paying it off with the sales of a whole bunch of books I won (keeping 43 out of the 100 though for some 'light' reading lol), as well as using some cash from my bank. I'm coming up on almost a month having it now – using it 3 times a week. I've clocked 41,500 meters in total thus far – I don't think it's too bad for a novice, but having said that I don't know what the average is for a novice – better than nothing anyway!

I decided after the 2nd or 3rd week, that I will aim to get around 18K meters per week minimum, so 6,000 meters (or more) 3 times a week. I've lost some weight off my back and I'm getting more definition in my arms and calf muscles now, so hopefully by modifying my diet I will continue to lose more! I'm also considering doing a juice fast for 7 days to kick start my weight loss goal even more too, by using wheatgrass, vege juices, water, and chia seeds for energy (also reduces food cravings and has tons of essential amino acids – amazing superfood).

Each time my mind procrastinates and I think about leaving rowing off for another day (which leads to 'i'll do it tomorrow' then soon you know you've sold the thing and it was all for nothing lol) I remind myself that enough is enough, and in fact I have printed and laminated a couple things on commitment and motivation to keep me inspired. Each time I row I just think about the people who bullied me at school and that I can prove them wrong. I think about all the homophobes that tell me I'm not worthy of living. And finally, each time a drop of sweat falls I feel like I'm sweating out all the tears of hurt I've cried. All of that keeps me determined to keep rowing.

Here is what I printed and laminated for keeping me determined 😛

Motivation and commitment

“There is a cumulative value to investing small amounts of time in certain activities over a long period.”

Exercise is an obvious illustration of this principle. There’s a clear cumulative effect from exercising a few minutes every day or every other day over a long period of time. At the end of a year, you can see and feel a difference. But at the end of your first exercise session, the only difference is that you are sore. You will see almost no measurable benefit from a single session; in fact, no matter how long you have been exercising, there is almost no measurable benefit from a single session. That’s why it is so easy to talk ourselves out of exercise.

What will hurt if a miss a day? The answer is, it won’t hurt anything, physically speaking. The real value in exercise is not found in any one deposit of time; the value is realized at the end of a sequence of deposits. Exercise has a compounding effect. It is the consistent, incremental investments of time that make a difference.

Let’s suppose your new year’s resolution this January was to exercise three days a week. You joined a health club. You bought a rower. You announced to friends and family that this would be your year to get in shape. Now let’s imagine that it hasn’t worked out:

Other things kept interfering with your exercise routine. Chances are, you do not have to use much imagination on this one, but let’s take it a step further. Now imagine that you sit down with a friend six months into the year and explain what you did instead of exercising. How might that conversation go?

“What did you do instead of exercising?”

I don’t know

“What else did you do instead of exercising?”

I don’t know

“What did you do then?”

I can’t remember. Just… stuff

Here is the point: if you stack up all the stuff you did instead of exercising, then added up their value, what would you end up with? Zero. They add up to a lot of wasted time. We waste our life. This principle explains why we don’t have more to show for our time. It all gets gobbled up with random, unquantifiable activities – activities that rob us of what’s most important. When you add up all the what-I-did-instead-ofs, they always equal ZERO.

Skip work one Friday and you’ll probably still have a job on Monday. Pick up a newspaper instead of your bible one morning and life goes on. It’s deceiving but true that we rarely see any immediate consequences for neglecting a single installment of time in any arena of life. But if neglect becomes your pattern, you will eventually bump up against our third principle:

“Neglect has a cumulative effect”

Make some things habit:

• Read the bible more often

• Listen to sermon/s daily

• Row 3-4 times a week

The important areas of life require small deposits all along the way. And if you miss those opportunities, they are lost forever. Most of us have made the mistake of trying to make up for missed time in the gym. You know what I’m talking about. You haven’t exercised in years, then suddenly you decide to get back into shape. So what do you do? The MEGAWORKOUT.

You do it all. You know better, but something in you says, “I can make up for lost time; I can make up for my neglect.” So you walk away convinced that you have reclaimed lost ground. You feel so toned, so in shape. You even consider running for governor. But the next morning you can’t get out of bed. In fact, you are so sore you don’t go to the gym for a week. Or worse, you injure yourself and are out for even longer. The moral of the story is, you cannot make up for lost time in the areas of life that matter most.

I'm tracking my progress on the concept 2 forums logbook each time I row too, so yeah it's been awesome. Thanks for checking up on me 😛


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