I do not know if [food van organisation A] and [food van organisation B] are the same people. Funny story though. I actually should have redacted their name as I don’t think I will be allowed to continue volunteering with them if I am gay (and what we do is pretty important). Oh well, I don’t think they are sophisticated enough to use Google alerts.

When I first joined the forum and wrote this I was desperate to meet people like me that I could relate to. Now in the last few weeks the flood gates have opened. I met five other gay Christians in Brisbane (incl. davidt), a whole bunch of F2B members in Sydney, just met 2quik on the coast, are meeting greengoose next weekend, and there is a Christmas dinner coming up. All beautiful people. I don’t feel isolated anymore. It’s been an answer to prayer.

It’s letter time.

First cut:

Dear Mum and Dad,

I love you. I am very grateful to have you as my parents. Since I have been volunteering with [redacted] I have seen the type of things that could happen to anyone if they don’t have great parents like you. You have both worked hard to give me a great start in life. I know you are proud of me, and I am proud of you for the sacrifices you have made.

This needs to be said because sometimes I forget how lucky I am and also because other people try to make be behave otherwise. You see, there is something I need to tell you that has taken me a very long time to accept about myself and I think it will take you a while as well. But it is now something that I love about myself.

I am gay. I first knew when I was only 12 but I thought it must be just the crazy hormones that were kicking in and that I’d grow out of it. I even told one of the guys back at [redacted] and they said much the same thing. But they were wrong, I didn’t grow out of it.

For the rest of High school I basically just ignored it. Everyone thought I was straight, so it was easy enough. I just didn’t gawk over girls like the other guys. But once I was at UNI I couldn’t ignore it any longer.

I didn’t take it very well when I finally “came out” to myself. In fact, I spent weeks depressed and I distinctly remember thinking that being gay was so horrible I could never even tell anyone, ever. I did end up telling a handful of friends though – [redacted] was the first. They have proven to be really good friends.

I spent 3-4 years secretly reading up on all the ex-gay information I could find and trying to change myself. They contain a lot of lies about sexuality that are easy to believe when you are desperate. They even say bad things about you. But none of it is true. I was never abused, I am not emasculated, and you fantastic parents.

After trying to change for so long and seeing no progress, nor any answer to my prayers, I reached a point where I knew that becoming straight would not be possible. Yet for me being a Christian and being gay were irreconcilable. I love God very much and it felt horrible to be in this position.

I finally did what I should have done many years ago – I studied what the bible had to say about homosexuality. I was very thorough and spent months learning as much as I could. I have to say that I was surprised how strong the biblical arguments for affirming same-sex relationships were. So eventually I came to accept who I am.

Being gay makes me special. Being a gay Christian makes me a testimony to the grace of God who loves me just as I am. The months since I have come to appreciate this have been the happiest in my life. God loves me, and no one else’s opinion is important after that.

I know that you do not approve of LGBT people. To be truly honest, you have made many comments over the years that I have found silently hurtful and this has made it much harder to come out to you. But the stereotype about gay people that the media and the church has made you believe is simply not true. I know several great Christian gay people in loving, committed relationships who show that whilst my sexuality was not a choice, my morality is.

I want to live my life in a way that still makes you proud. I love God and the way I have been able to help the less fortunate. My experience has given me a special concern for society’s rejects. As a gay Christian and have so many opportunities to kindly present God’s love in a way few can.

I would not have chosen to be gay, but now I would not give it up. I love my life and I can’t keep thus great part of my secret any longer.

I know this letter has been hard to read. As it took me years to accept myself, it may also take you some time. There is some help available. PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays) has a chapter in Brisbane. They can be found at http://www.pflagaustralia.org.au/. I can also put you in touch with parents of other young, gay Christians and please feel free to talk to whoever you need to. I have other resources about homosexuality that I will give you as you feel you are ready.

I love you,

[redacted]

BTW Mr Summit…….there will be no charge for all the editing done by the wonderful writers in the group……..hehe :bigsmile:

Any time you want to make a donation to the wonderful organisation it would always be appreciated. 🙂

When everyone gives a little……it all adds up to a lot.

but of course we dont want people to feel pressured like they may have experienced in churches previously…….although I guess a lot of us still believe giving is a good principle to live by whether we still have our faith or not.

Hey Mr Summit,

I have been reading through your story and the comments from other forum members, and have been really touched by your story – and your honesty. I think it is awesome that you are able to write this letter to your parents. I came out to my family a few years back now – but I can remember how terrified I was as I had ‘the conversation’ and how afraid I was afterwards about what changes it would make to my relationships with my family. Ultimately, I was very blessed to have such a great family who accepted me and loved me. I remember a particular incident a few years after coming out to my Mum. (She had not initially agreed with ‘my choice’). I was getting something out of my wardrobe, and she said to me. “Now, Jason, I thought you had already come out of the closet”. It was a comment from my mother that really surprised me as I turned around and saw the smile on her face – and it also showed me how far she had come in accepting her ‘gay’ son’s sexuality. :bigsmile:

So, I will be praying for you, that God will be sitting down with you and your parents, when you give them that letter, and that he will be working on everyone in that room.

Querido Summit,

I am so glad that you have been shown so many of your GLBT brothers and sisters in the faith! Truly, the Lord has blessed you abundantly.

As for your parents, the only advice I can offer is that you take your time and wait until you are truly ready to tell them. Either way, remember this: we are with you. Gay and straight, we are with you. But above all, the Lord is with you and a more powerful or loyal ally you will not find than he.

Yours in Christ,

Raul

PS:

I possibly outed my self by not giving him a cold shoulder like a good conservative boy is supposed to do.

Not a right winger myself, but I’m not sure which Cons you’re talking about.

Have you seen these guys?

http://www.gaypatriot.net/